Your questioning is a good thing.one thing bugs me a little about the idea that the EU makes their members vote again and again until arriving at the right result. Between the votes, the EU make changes to the treaty to win over doubters.
Does this mean that the method is anti-democratic?
I am not sure about this. Here are two scenarios:
1. Vote on leaving the EU once in 2016, follow through then a few years down the line, 2025, a new government sets up another vote to rejoin this time.
2. Vote again and again until arriving at a clear margin (like 60/40) before leaving.
Which one is more democratic?
I have often thought, even suggested, that we perhaps could have an annual referendum EU membership. Quite possibly, some years the result will suggest leaving whilst other years it will be remain.
The critical bit is that we don't suddenly jump out. We reflect. We wait for a succession of leave results before making irrevocable decisions. Between referendums we analyse why the vote went that way. We try to make changes so that everyone is happy.
Of course, this is completely pie in the sky and wishful thinking. People won't engage in such a referendum every year. Politicians will ignore - to the best of their ability.