Bike Jokes Thread.

[Mandy]

well here's the cow who was drinking with the Horse in the pub...

but the monkey... he really did cycle home.

Well i'm shocked! all that horse told me about was the camel who got the hump when they called time and the centipede who got legless, lol
As for the cow? I didn't know that she was with him? I wonder if there is any "udder" things he hasn't told me about after his jaunt on my Wisper?
Well he won't be borrowing it again especially after almost losing my bike and "hanging" around with that monkey!!
He's now grounded in his stable and the closest he is going to get to a beer is his oats and bran
Unless you know otherwise of course?
lol!

 

[MaryinScotland]

Story pinched from Dave Allen, a long time ago. I can't remember now whether the priest or the minister was the first speaker, so apologies if I get it the wrong way round.
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In a remote parish in rural Ireland, the Catholic priest and the Church of Ireland minister used to see each other as they cycled round visiting their parishioners, and they always exchanged friendly greetings.

One day, when they met, the minister was walking. "What happened to your bike?" asked the priest.

"Someone stole it," replied the minister.

The priest said, "You know, the same thing happened to me once. What I did was, the following Sunday, I preached a sermon on the Ten Commandments, and I came down hard on 'Thou shalt not steal.' The thief must have taken it to heart, because next day, my bike turned up outside my door."

"I'll try it," promised the minister.

The following week, they met again, and the minister had his bike back.

"So the sermon on the Ten Commandments worked, then," remarked the priest. "The thief brought your bike back."

"Well, not quite," replied the minister. "When I got to 'Thou shalt not commit adultery,' I remembered where I left it."

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