The Great E- Bike Bank Heist

[Woosh]

What with the gloomy weather and our wonderful recession, I think a major bank heist (by us) might be in order. We could then all add a bit to our pensions and no longer fret at night. Having seen on the telly smash and grabs and other robberies done on motorbikes lately, I'm thinking along the lines of a group effort on our e bikes.

So my suggestion is (a bit along the lines of Hustle, I guess):

Masterplanning - Flecc

Hardware coordination - (souping up the e bikes ready for the perfect attack): d8veh

Beautiful blonde who butters up unsuspecting bankers: Funkylyn

Robbers: me, old Dave, Muckymitts, Kudos Dave, JerrySimon, Rob F, Cyclezee... in fact any members wanting to have a go and with a baraclava in their bottom drawer.
London 'Knowledge' (ie streets) a must for all robbers, also someone with a Luton van a few miles away ready for when our batteries run out.

Split all proceeds and meet up a few days later in Malaga.

Let me know if you're in.


Hatti

 

[Old_Dave]

Let me know if you're in.

I'll throw a few beers down my throat and let you know (beer makes everything seem like a good idea)

But seriously though, there's no down side to the plan..

Get away with it and its a life of not worrying about being looked after or paying the bills.

Get caught for it and its a life of not worrying about being looked after or paying the bills.

 

[103Alex1]

Get caught for it and its a life of not worrying about being looked after or paying the bills.

Lol. You'd be deprived your eBike privileges though... would have to set up a production line manufacturing division, profits to the governor, in exchange for the odd test ride round the exercise yard on a rota basis. Play nicely now ... and don't go dropping any spanners

 

[Deleted member 4366]

I've got a better idea. Do the bankers rather than the bank, I think they'll have more money, and they stole it from us anyway, so it's rightfully ours.

 

[Kudoscycles]

Hatti.....as I said recently to my bank manager.
'I suggest that you leave the doors of the bank open 24/7,there are more robbers inside than you ever need to fear from the guys with the shooters outside!!!!'
He was not amused,no sense of humour these bankers!!!!
KudosDave

 

[Scimitar]

You may jest, but I refer you to the Clydesdale Bank Bicycle Robber...
http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/the-scot-who-went-from-crook-to-crime-1030697
"He targeted another Clydesdale Bank, this time one in Whiteinch, Glasgow, and Crosbie and the same partner made off on bicycles with £ 87,000." That was a decent amount of money in 1974.
There was a minor rash of bicycle bank robberies about then - the perfect getaway vehicle, in a city.

 

[Woosh]

You may jest, but I refer you to the Clydesdale Bank Bicycle Robber...
http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/the-scot-who-went-from-crook-to-crime-1030697
"He targeted another Clydesdale Bank, this time one in Whiteinch, Glasgow, and Crosbie and the same partner made off on bicycles with £ 87,000." That was a decent amount of money in 1974.
There was a minor rash of bicycle bank robberies about then - the perfect getaway vehicle, in a city.

Well I'm blowed. Did they ever get caught?

A few years bank a motorbiker went into a small branch of Natwest here in Southend and asked the girl at the window to hand over her cash. She told him she would if he took his helmet off... so he did!!! Then realised what a plonker he was and legged it. You have to laugh.....


Hatti

 

[flecc]

My favourite bank robbery incident was here in Croydon a number of years ago. The would-be robber queued obediently and when his turn came he demanded money from the cashier, pointing a covered "gun". The cashier ducked below the counter and the robber panicked and ran for the glass door. Pushing hard against it, it wouldn't open however hard he tried, and he sank to the floor in despair.

When the police arrived they merely pushed open the door from the outside and arrested him. Yes, in his panic he hadn't realised that all he had to do was pull the door to open it!

 

[funkylyn]

What with the gloomy weather and our wonderful recession, I think a major bank heist (by us) might be in order. We could then all add a bit to our pensions and no longer fret at night. Having seen on the telly smash and grabs and other robberies done on motorbikes lately, I'm thinking along the lines of a group effort on our e bikes.

So my suggestion is (a bit along the lines of Hustle, I guess):

Masterplanning - Flecc

Hardware coordination - (souping up the e bikes ready for the perfect attack): d8veh

Beautiful blonde who butters up unsuspecting bankers: Funkylyn

Robbers: me, old Dave, Muckymitts, Kudos Dave, JerrySimon, Rob F, Cyclezee.. in fact any members wanting to have a go and with a baraclava in their bottom drawer.
London 'Knowledge' (ie streets) a must for all robbers, also someone with a Luton van a few miles away ready for when our batteries run out.

Split all proceeds and meet up a few days later in Malaga.

Let me know if you're in.


Hatti

Im in Hatti......dont know about the beautiful.... but at least Im blonde......not only that I can either throw the ex husband out of my house in the hills near Malaga where we can all hide out for the duration OR.....maybe a run down ruin in the wilds of the Bussaco forest, Portugal would be a better hideaway....they would NEVER find us there.....even I have problems when I try to visit it

Transport out of London for the bikes....D8veh, Gordonal and I have m/homes.. has a trailer...hey, this is sounding more tempting by the minute

Regarding the buttering up bankers.....can I keep any tips I might get as an extra payment ?

Glad you are feeling better after your cold, or maybe you arent ? and this is how you get when you get bored ......dangerous lol ......I know the feeling....

Lynda

 

[Old_Dave]

Sorted.... Safe house down to Lyn




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[Old_Dave]

A question arises....

Do we need travel insurance to be arranged for the group, cos when one gets to a certain age it's really a good idea ?


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[RobF]

I witnessed a street robbery on a bicycle.

Young lad cycling on the pavement appeared to crash into a female pedestrian.

I thought that's all it was until she screamed: "He's got my phone!" as he legged it.

I gave chase and so did a passing taxi driver who was, er, of better physique than me for the task in hand.

The lad ran like a whippet and I don't think 'we' would have caught him had he not tried to vault a fence, make a balls of it, and land in a heap on the other side.

By the time I caught up, the taxi driver had him pinned to the ground.

Another passer-by mentioned calling the police, to which the lad said: "Don't do that, just give us a good hiding, I'll say nowt."

A good hiding probably would have been preferable to the 18 months in a young offenders' institution which he (eventually) got.

 

[funkylyn]

A question arises....

Do we need travel insurance to be arranged for the group, cos when one gets to a certain age it's really a good idea ?


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Can we leave that to you to sort then Dave ?

I think I am doing my bit with all the buttering , get away vehicle for bikes, and the safe house

Lynda

 

[Cyclezee]

What with the gloomy weather and our wonderful recession, I think a major bank heist (by us) might be in order. We could then all add a bit to our pensions and no longer fret at night. Having seen on the telly smash and grabs and other robberies done on motorbikes lately, I'm thinking along the lines of a group effort on our e bikes.

So my suggestion is (a bit along the lines of Hustle, I guess):

Masterplanning - Flecc

Hardware coordination - (souping up the e bikes ready for the perfect attack): d8veh

Beautiful blonde who butters up unsuspecting bankers: Funkylyn

Robbers: me, old Dave, Muckymitts, Kudos Dave, JerrySimon, Rob F, Cyclezee... in fact any members wanting to have a go and with a baraclava in their bottom drawer.
London 'Knowledge' (ie streets) a must for all robbers, also someone with a Luton van a few miles away ready for when our batteries run out.

Split all proceeds and meet up a few days later in Malaga.

Let me know if you're in.


Hatti

Hatti,

You forgot to invite the Loughborough mob along with Banbury bone crusher Frank only kidding guys........no really

 

[Shroppielass]

I think I am doing my bit with all the buttering , get away vehicle for bikes, and the safe house

Lynda

Aren't you forgetting the designer knitted balaclavas?

 

[funkylyn]

Aren't you forgetting the designer knitted balaclavas?

Haha.....Steady on.....if I do much more I may as well do it alone lol

Hmmmmm .....watch this space......maybe us women could band together and do it ourselves....I will refrain from any sexist remarks cos Im in a good mood

Lynda

 

[Woosh]

Aren't you forgetting the designer knitted balaclavas?

You are dead right Shroppielass.

Lynda can knit up the PERFECT balaclavas for the complete mob....can't you Lynda?
Can I have mine in pastel pink as the spring is nearly upon us (well I thought it was).

Cold almost gone but rotten journey back to Southend, had to stop twice and does myself up with coffee and aspirin.
Banbury Frank sounds like he could be very useful. I will give him a shout when we get to the planning stage.

Hatti

 

[jazper53]

You are dead right Shroppielass.

Lynda can knit up the PERFECT balaclavas for the complete mob....can't you Lynda?
Can I have mine in pastel pink as the spring is nearly upon us (well I thought it was).

Cold almost gone but rotten journey back to Southend, had to stop twice and does myself up with coffee and aspirin.
Banbury Frank sounds like he could be very useful. I will give him a shout when we get to the planning stage.

Hatti

I would not start planning any E-bike heist down my way, as we already have a flying squad of e-bikes ready to pounce on any Bonnie and Clyde e-bikers

 

[john h]

got the balaclava on most days at work anaway hatti trouble is i am the one being robbed [ by the boss]

 

[Old_Dave]

Bit of a hiccup..

Spoken to some peeps wot do travel insurance and in order to give a quote they needed the details of the trip and were we going to engage in any dangerous activity..

When I mentioned about the heist at the beginning of the trip that could be an eeny weeny bit dangerous cos it may involve being shot at whilst riding our bikes they said that the underwriter wouldn't be interested.. I asked if this was because we were using electric bikes, but they put the phone down, so maybe I should phone back on Monday