Glaswegian understanding

[indalo]

Wee Billy from Glasgow always wanted to look cool. To that end, his friend told him that he needed a good, designer pair of trainers to go with his shell suit.

Billy saved up all his Giros and all the money he got back from returning his empty bottles of Soda and Irn Brew and finally managed to get himself a pair of brilliant white trainers to go with his shell suit.

Proudly, he strutted down the street calling out to all the passers-by, "See ma new trainers? Stonkin, eh?"

One fine, upstanding gentleman pointed out that they were indeed a fine pair of trainers but was young Billy aware that one shoelace was undone?

Billy scornfully retorted that it was part of being cool to have a trailing lace on one trainer and that on the sole of the trainer there were instructions for the wearer to do such a thing.

When asked for proof of this instruction Billy took off his trainer and held it upside down for the disbeliever to read.

"There y'are! It clearly says ....Taiwan !"




Having been to Glasgow, I understood that immediately. If you have yet to visit, treat it as a first lesson in comprehension. You'll soon pick it up!

Indalo

 

[Jimod]

OK, Glasgow humour is it? Try this one.
Wee Glasgow woman walks into a bakers. She ponts and says to the baker, " is that a bun or a meringue? " The baker says? "no, you're right enough"

 

[indalo]

Excellent Jim! That's a perfect example....love it!

Indalo

 

[bode]

On on a cold day, woman sees something she likes the look of in the window of a Glasgow butcher's shop and goes in to find the owner standing near a radiator.
"Is that your Ayrshire bacon?" she asks.
"Nah, I'm just warmin' mah hands."

 

[TylerD]

True story - at a posh "do" in Glasgow the directors of a big company were being served their lunch, one of them had ordered spinach and the conversation was interrupted by a loud shout of "Which wan y yoose is Popeye?" from one of the waitresses